Chapter 13 Text Transcript
Chapter 13
CHAPTER 13
UGLY
MHE – PAGE 377
DOOR HANGER:
Again?
MHE – PAGE 378
Hazard:
What are you doing here?
Phineas:
-Huh?
Hazard:
What are you DOING here?
Phineas:
I’m here to take your ship!
I told you I was comin’.
Hazard:
I don’t think that’s it.
You might want me to, but I don’t believe you’re stupid enough to think going through me was the best way to produce a vessel.
That wouldn’t make you HATE me the way you do. I can feel you seething.
You have no stake in the town or its people. You’re nobody’s champion. Why did you stay?
Why go to all this trouble?
MHE – PAGE 379
Phineas:
I’m responsible for you.
Hazard:
What business of yours am I?
Phineas:
Gods, or. . . whatever it is YOU are, going around making things awful for people smaller than you, I. . .
. . .
I can’t take it, It makes me sick. It’s not fair.
So I made it my business.
I made myself strong enough to fight.
Hazard:
A town full of those innocent souls you’re so concerned about is turning to ash beneath us.
You’ve caused far more damage here than I have.
Phineas:
It’s better that it burns than it keeps existing under your thumb.
Or anything else’s. That’s not a life
Hazard:
I would think that’s the citizens’ decision to make, not yours.
Phineas:
How?!
No one with any power ever listens! You don’t even care enough to hate them!
But you’re listening to me. The Tain and the stars are all listening to me so I’ll speak for them that can’t.
This stops.
Hazard:
. . . The sun, to you, then, is power. A status.
A means to get you this attention you think you’re entitled to.
MHE – PAGE 380
Hazard:
Protecting others from gods by becoming a god, that doesn’t sound incongruous to you?
Are you a patron of the people, or are you looking for a sympathetic excuse to sate your own ego?
Phineas:
I can manage both, yeah?
Hazard:
. . .
I had a very similar conversation with Crow, some. . . ah, some unwieldy number of years ago.
He too decided to gather all his righteous fury and set off to right these injustices he perceived.
And I told him I said – He told me, “Don’t worry so much.”
He would be a different kind of god. He would never do what they had done to us.
Could never. Not him. “It’s me,” he said.
We both should have been smarter than that, but I wanted so much to believe in him. . .
If I’d known what my faith in him would cultivate, what it would cost us, I could have prevented this.
I’m not looking for redemption. But I’ve grown since I was last presented with this circumstance.
This time I am wiser.
MHE – PAGE 381
Hazard:
I won’t make the mistake of letting another monster slip by me. This world will not suffer Crow’s influence.
His legacy ends with us.
I’m going to dump your broken body at his feet.
I’m going to carve every trace of stolen light from his bones.
And finally this wretched business will be finished.
Phineas:
Well that ain’t gonna work.
I’m not dyin’ here.
And I can’t let you kill Gideon.
Hazard:
No. . .
You can’t.
MHE – PAGE 382
(No dialogue)
MHE – PAGE 383
(No dialogue)
MHE – PAGE 384
(No dialogue)
MHE – PAGE 385
Phineas:
You ain’t scary old man!!
Hazard:
You should not have shone so proudly, false god.
Phineas:
St-
(Stop!!)
MHE – PAGE 386
Hazard:
Disappointing.
MHE – PAGE 387
Eisse:
His crazy was never as overt as it is now before he started working with the Tain, but my father’s been trying to kill Gideon my whole life.
At least.
He keeps. . . He stops. Any time he starts making progress with a plan he just quits.
MHE – PAGE 388
Eisse:
He always comes up with some excuse, but it’s clear he just loses his nerve.
Ulrich:
Is Gideon really that powerful?
Eisse:
Maybe a little bit.
Dad compares him to a god all the time, but it’s not that he’s afraid of Gideon. . .
Ulrich:
What do you think holds him back?
Eisse:
. . . He loves him, still, is all I can figure.
He’d never admit it. But I don’t know why else he would be so obsessed, if it’s really been as long as he says it has since their schism.
You don’t go to this kind of trouble for something you don’t love. Somehow. Does that make sense?
Ulrich:
I think so.
Eisse:
. . . Well!
I can’t spend my life like this, obviously. I’ve got my own plans.
This whole front with the starstone was my doing, actually.
Those uh, partners, I mentioned.
When I told them Dad was considering experiments with the Tain they suggested I nudge him in this direction.
Dad wasn’t interested in the capital, but I’ve been squirrelling away what I could for myself while he’s been distracted.
That’s not saying a lot, since none of our operations have been organized well enough to make much of a profit, but I’ve done my best.
Dusk- Ah, the boss, my boss, I suppose, said I wouldn’t NEED my own money while we’re working together. He would provide anything I asked for.
I told him I wouldn’t feel right living off of someone else’s allowance.
MHE – PAGE 389
Ulrich:
You were stalling, you wanted to stay here longer.
Hoping things might change?
Eisse:
And all I’ve gotten for it is another breakdown. More mess to clean up.
But you catching up with me here, of all places. It’s almost like a sign, don’t you think?
Now’s the time.
Once Dad’s finished ridding you of your baggage we’ll arrange a meeting with Dusk.
He’ll get a kick out of your little mask shtick.
. . . So you’re all caught up with me! Your turn now.
What is it you’re doing out here? You never said before and I’m DYING to know.
Ulrich:
I’m sorry if the truth is not as romantic as you imagined.
I owe some dangerous people a lot of money.
Eisse:
Finally had an unlucky day, did you?
Ulrich:
I had several unlucky days.
Nothing as dramatic as yours, I’m sure, but unfortunate nonetheless.
Adventuring can be lucrative in ways most occupations are not. But it gets filthy.
In an effort to keep my own hands clean, I’ve been looking for someone strong and simple to pair up with.
Phineas Kidd is both.
Though, if dirt can be avoided altogether, even better.
MHE – PAGE 390
Eisse:
Well that’s no problem.
I didn’t want to owe someone if I didn’t have to,
But if you’re following commanders into the desert I’d say pride isn’t an issue you’re concerned with.
Ulrich:
I am too afraid to be ashamed.
I am too tired. Anything would be better than this.
But I. . .
I’d still rather not go into a negotiation blindly.
What can you tell me about these people you work with? What is Dusk like?
Eisse:
. . . It is sort of odd.
For someone who calls himself Dusk, he seems. . . bright. He shines.
MHE – PAGE 391
Hazard:
May I offer some constructive criticism?
Fighting is often easier if you’re facing your opponent.
Yes! Just like that.
Do keep practicing.
Phineas:
Come on!!
Hazard:
You’ll get it.
MHE – PAGE 392
Hazard:
So you and the star are joined seamlessly.
Phineas:
What did you –
Hazard:
Your bones are radiant with the sun’s fire and you still cannot touch me.
What did the keeper hope to gain from such a weak vessel?
Phineas:
It wasn’t –
It was an ACCIDENT, why do you keep
Hazard:
Crow Gideon,
Seems to be involved in a lot of accidents.
Look at me.
How many of his wounds must you see before you admit what he is?
Phineas:
– He. . .
Hazard:
Oh.
MHE – PAGE 393
Hazard:
YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE SPECIAL.
Mana:
(WAIT WAIT)
Hazard:
You thought he did this to you for your sake.
You didn’t realize this is just Crow’s habit of absolving himself of responsibility.
Mana:
(That HURTS!)
Hazard:
You thought he cared.
MHE – PAGE 394
Hazard:
Why do I know exactly where you hurt?
If Crow is faultless then why are you so angry?
Mana:
What’s wrong with you?!
Hazard:
Who are you angry with?
Mana:
Crow isn’t worth
Phineas:
SHUT UP SHUT UP!
WHY CAN’T I –
Mana:
STUPID GIRL!
STUPID
STUPID!
Hazard:
Even bodies like ours have their raw nerves.
Mana:
Can’t you see what he’s doing?!
Hazard:
Though, when Crow is involved they do become easier to find.
MHE – PAGE 395
Hazard:
He didn’t even say goodbye, did he?
He never does.
MHE – PAGE 396
Ulrich:
. . . Thank you, Rook.
You really –
You really don’t understand what this means to me.
Eisse:
Enough that you’re through being upset with me for leaving you out to dry?
Are we square, at least?
Ulrich:
More than square.
If this works out I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to make it up to you.
Eisse:
You don’t need to worry about that. . .
It’s been nice to have someone I can talk to again. I’ve missed your good company.
Ulrich:
It is difficult to find good company with lifestyles like ours.
It gets lonely.
MHE – PAGE 397
Ulrich:
I – seeing as I’ve already admitted so much today. . .
You were right. . . . This – was a lot of trouble to go to for a piece of jewelry.
Even if I had been angry with you for Verdantia, that would not have been worth the ordeal of finding you.
I just. . . I couldn’t bear the thought of never seeing you again.
Eisse:
(Sigh)
Ulrich,
You know there are better ways to express your feelings for someone than shooting at them.
Ulrich:
I am new at this.
I wanted to tell you before, but I –
Things happened so fast the right time never came and then it was too late.
And today has been one long reminder of how quickly things can change. So I’m – I know, it’s –
It is probably strange, on the heels of everything else we’ve discussed, but I didn’t want –
I had to –
T-tell you. . .
MHE – PAGE 398
Eisse:
There was something I wanted to do before, too.
Wha. . ?
MHE – PAGE 399
Eisse:
(AAIIIIIIIIAGGHHH)
MHE – PAGE 400
Ulrich:
. . .
It occurs to me that you have likely never been injured like this.
You’re handling it fairly well, though now is usually when the nausea hits.
It is a good thing we were finished eating.
Eisse:
Ooh I’m gonna – a kill you
I’m gonna KILL YOU!!
What sort of person does these things?
Ulrich:
Steals something she knows damn well is not just a piece of costume jewelry.
Or gains a lady’s trust before causing irreparable harm to her manicure.
You and I, Rook and Ulrich, we are the worst kinds of people.
Why would I turn myself into this for money?
I’ve done awful things, I am going to continue doing awful things because they are necessary.
But I’m not going to absolve myself of their weight by blaming somebody else for my actions.
My decisions are my own.
I am nobody’s dog.
Bel:
(No?)
Ulrich:
And I have no respect for someone who sees fit to work with a spoiled child like you.
MHE – PAGE 401
Eisse:
You RAT!!
My father is going to
Ulrich:
Your father won’t be going much of anything for a while.
Assuming the good Commander Kidd lets him live. Frankly I am not sure what she will do.
Either way, I will be long gone by the time he cares enough to bother with me.
That said.
I know how I prefer to do things.
Thank you for the sandwiches.
Eisse:
OH JUST FUCKING TRY –
For real?!
You carry that antique and can’t even keep track of your shots?!
Ulrich:
I have never miscounted.
MHE – PAGE 402
Ulrich:
What in the hell was THAT?!
Eisse:
O – oh
Oh no
OH NO
Ulrich:
Wh – !
What’s –
Bel:
. . .
Hmm. I guess that’s that.
Ulrich:
(HUFFF)
Bel:
Good boy.
Ulrich:
(-Ach)
(Come on)
Bel:
I told you it’s easier if you (be still)
Ulrich:
(Sigh)
Na gut, dann.
Bel:
You listening? I said it’s easier if you make it into a performance, didn’t I?
It’s just another show.
CARD:
BEL FORTUNA
A memory distorted
Small, vicious
Bel:
Now suck it up and get back out there.
And would it kill you to smile?
MHE – PAGE 403
Phineas:
IT’S YOUR FAULT! IT’S YOUR FAULT!!
Jocasta:
Phineas come on now –
Phineas:
YOU’RE STUPID AND UGLY AND MEAN!!
WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANNA STAY HERE WITH A ROTTEN HAG LIKE YOU?!
Jocasta:
That’s enough.
You can’t be hittin’ people ‘cause you’re mad.
Phineas:
WHY?! YOU HIT GIDEON ALL THE TIME.
LET GO!!
Jocasta:
Get back here!
Where are you going?!
NOTE:
Phin
MHE – PAGE 404
Jocasta:
Go get in the tub.
And don’t leave those wet clothes on the rug.
MHE – PAGE 405
Jocasta:
That temper’s gonna get your ass in trouble real fast.
Where’d you run off to?
Phineas:
I –
I went to Gideon’s house.
Jocasta:
Yeah I figured
Phineas:
Jo, I’m
I’m sorry I called you stupid. And a hag, And uh
Um
MHE – PAGE 406
Phineas:
Please don’t get rid of me
I wonder
If they can feel how slow my heart is beating
I can’t remember the last time I felt cold like this.
Mana:
I cannot remember when we last disagreed like this.
Phineas:
I thought, by now I thought I would. . .
I’m still not enough.
Mana:
It is nothing to do with substance
MHE – PAGE 407
Mana:
If you will listen to me now.
You can’t beat him because he’s fought this battle before, from your side.
He knows where you are weak because he knows where he himself is weak.
We must persevere beyond him.
Don’t pretend you do not know how. I’ve renounced my god and you’ve held on to yours far longer than you should have.
Or have you decided that we will die here?
Phineas:
Not yet.
MHE – PAGE 408
Phineas:
That’s Hazard, and. . .
The compass? And me? But we’re all. . .
Then this
Then this isn’t
MHE – PAGE 409
Hazard:
H-how?!
-Wait!
MHE – PAGE 410
Hazard:
Please let’s-
Phineas:
Look at me, derelict.
“Gideon”:
S-stop!
Phineas what are you doing?!
Phineas:
On no
Hazard:
Uncanny, isn’t it?
My brother and I mastered this trick long before we learned magic.
MHE – PAGE 411
Hazard:
I’ve been wearing his face all this time and you never saw it, you never even considered it.
You commanders only see ideals, never things as they actually ARE.
How could your Crow Gideon possibly share blood with someone like me?
Surely I’m just some bitter enemy from the past.
It COULDN’T be that he would abandon his own twin in such a sorry state. Not our golden boy.
Though, now that we are here, I realize this may be less complex.
I assumed you a disciple, drawn in by his gravity like the others.
. . . But you were so small.
And you told me yourself.
You just thought you had found a family.
If he could do this to me, real family, how much do you think it bothered him to do it to you?
You spoke so boldly of killing gods yet you are here regardless, dying on an unwatched altar.
Your ambition, your own BODY was handed to you by a con artist. What could you accomplish with that?
What reason do you have to continue?
Phineas:
I – I’m
MHE – PAGE 412
Phineas:
I’m not. . . doing any of this. For Gideon
I’m doing it for me.
I knew. A long time ago what –
What he is.
That’s why I’m here.
You let yourself turn into this.
And I – I won’t break for someone like you. Or Gideon.
You’ll have to fight me forever.
Hazard:
. . . Stubborn.
Phineas:
GET FUCKED
Hazard:
I want to speak with the other one. Your star.
Mana:
THIEF!
MHE – PAGE 413
Mana:
MINE THAT’S MINE GIVE IT BACK
Hazard:
Gladly.
Assistant:
Sir?
MHE – PAGE 414
The Second:
Oh, my, I’m still here.
Is there a problem?
CARD:
(The Derelict Eye)
The Second
Regret Iridescent
Mana:
PHINEAS
Phineas why did you stop me??
CARD:
Mana
The Fifth
Furious Avarice
Mana:
You don’t understand what you’re taking from me. I remember being – I was so much more –
Do you realize how strong we could be if you just let me. It would only take a second
Phineas:
No one’s eating anybody today.
I’m sorry, I know you miss the way you were but there’s barely room for you and me in this body.
That’s not what we’re here for.
The Second:
This is disgraceful.
Where are your wings? Your eyes, your TEETH? And you are obedient to . . .this?
It is lucky no one came back for you.
Neither of you are quite one thing or the other.
A human who insists on meddling with godhood
And a god child who gave up their status to wrap themself in vestigial humanity.
MHE – PAGE 415
The Second:
You are ugly.
I am repulsed to think we were ever of a single being.
Star Astray, indeed. No place will keep you.
Mana:
. . . I am trying very hard. Phineas.
If I cannot eat it may I kill it. At least?
Phineas:
Normally yeah, but we need this one.
I came when you called. You owe me now, isn’t that how this works?
The Second:
It is! You have done me a great service separating me from the wizard.
He has been plagued with the desire to end his life since I have known him. The darkness that infects his body now that he has succeeded would have taken me too.
Yes! Your effort is appreciated. What would you have in return?
Phineas:
My. . . when Spectre took over, my body uh
Broke. Didn’t it?
The Second:
In every conceivable way.
Phineas:
Fix it. Put me back how I was before this fight started.
The Second:
. . .That is all? You want your mortal body repaired?
Phineas:
Can you see Ulrich? Is he okay?
The Second:
Who?
Oh, yes, there. He is well
Phineas:
How about the town?
The Second:
I can’t undo what Hastur has done, and the Tain still own the underground.
But I can restore what the fires took.
Phineas:
. . . Hazard. I feel like I should. . .
The Second:
He would begin to age, and without starlight the Tain will consume him.
And he. . .
MHE – PAGE 416
The Second:
He has gone to a great deal of trouble to die, in just this way.
If mercy concerns you, he would suffer even more if you forced him to carry on.
Phineas:
Yeah then. Patch me up.
Fix Ellie’s town.
The Second:
It is done!
You ask for such simple things. You don’t want
Phineas:
Just get out of here.
Mana:
(-Feh)
Phineas:
I really am sorry.
Mana:
I KNOW.
MHE – PAGE 417
Hazard:
Y-you. . . you let it go.
Why didn’t you take it?
Phineas:
. . .
Hazard:
What are you doing?
Phineas:
I don’t wanna stand here and watch you die on the floor.
Hazard:
Then you shouldn’t have
Phineas:
Give it a rest, man.
I’m not stupid. You could have killed me as soon as I walked in.
This is what you wanted.
You couldn’t let Gideon live, but you couldn’t stand to kill him either.
One of you had to go.
Then I showed up and I’m. . . I was close enough to Gideon it felt good to kick me around, huh?
And you thought I’d go out by trying to keep your star, that’s what Gideon would have done.
Self-destructing and taking me with you was some kind of closure you could get without-
Having to deal with him.
Dragging someone into a suicide pact is pretty uncool.
Hazard:
What did you think would happen when you came here?
Phineas:
I don’t know!! Not-
Not all this baggage. I thought you were just a despot with a nice ship.
The stuff you did isn’t excused, but. . .
I think I get it.
MHE – PAGE 418
Phineas:
And if I’m close enough to Gideon that hurting me feels good, maybe my apology would feel good too.
I know I’m missing pieces, but I’m sorry he broke your heart, Raven.
He broke mine too. You’re right, commanders are reckless.
I think everybody who gets too close eventually gets burned.
See, look at us, look at this mess.
Gods shouldn’t be able to do this so easily, you know? E-even if we love them.
Especially if we love them
We can do better.
I don’t think the universe needs to be so cruel.
If that’s the law I don’t accept it. I will rewrite it.
I can fix everything.
Hazard:
(HA Ha ha ha)
There must be
One of you in every world.
Maybe every Raven is meant to spend their days chasing after you.
H. . .
Hubris. . .
MHE – PAGE 419
Ulrich:
WE NEED TO GO
Phineas:
U-Ulrich! Are you
Ulrich:
The ship is coming apart! It’s broken loose from the tower and we’re drifting into the desert!
Phineas:
What do you mean it’s
Ulrich:
DO SOMETHING
MHE – PAGE 420
Phineas:
O-oh, uh
Hey?
Hey!
Hey we’re still here!
Knock it off!
Ulrich:
THE YELLING IS ACCOMPLISHING NOTHING
Phineas:
Why aren’t they listening?
Ulrich:
Wait, it looks like-
We’re heading for that big turtle and the rabbits from the shack? They’re just sitting there watching us-
It’s as good an idea as anything at this point.
Phineas:
It’s a whistle, you said?
Ulrich:
That’s what I was told.
Phineas:
Here, just in case.
I don’t know what it’ll do.
Ulrich:
. . . Nothing?
Any other ideas?
Phineas:
Nope.
I think it’ll be fine though.
MHE – PAGE 421
Phineas:
I think we’ll have to get used to this.
Jocasta:
Have a good nap?
Phineas:
It’s still raining. . .
Jocasta:
Mm, I been sitting here thinkin’.
You know what I like to do when shit sucks?
Cut out some dead weight.
Oh jeez
Oh man we fucked up kid
Quit that laughin’! This is a goddamn disaster.
I should be arrested.
Phineas:
It looks awful!!