Chapter 6 Text Transcript
Chapter 6
MHE – PAGE 120
CHAPTER 6
DON’T STARE
MHE – PAGE 121
The Second:
Commander!
Yes hello!
I’m speaking to you Star Astray.
Can you hear me?
I’m here!
I’m here!
Don’t leave me.
MHE – PAGE 122
Phineas:
Hmph. . .
Ulrich:
Not even going to say good morning?
I assumed even YOUR manners were better than that.
Phineas:
I thought you left! How’d you get up there so quiet?
Ulrich:
Pretty spry, for a big guy.
Aren’t I?
. . . Also you looked like you were sleeping really hard.
You DID spend an awful lot of time bleeding yesterday.
MHE – PAGE 123
Phineas:
Can I come up?
Ulrich:
I don’t know, can you?
Phineas:
Whatcha doin’ up here?
You lose something out there?
Ulrich:
I’m meditating to replenish my luck for the day.
Phineas:
Pff what?
Your luck?
Ulrich:
That’s right.
When I was younger, I wandered westward.
I ate seven sibling clovers from seven different soils
All grown in the light of one yellow sun.
My body brought them together and luck was bestowed on my bones.
Phineas:
Nuh uh!
Ulrich:
It’s true.
Phineas:
If I sit here and meditate with you, will I be lucky too?
Ulrich:
I don’t think it works that way.
But you can try.
MHE – PAGE 124
Ulrich:
(Ahem)
I…I may have been a bit overemotional last night.
I really could use your help.
With Hazard, I mean.
Phineas:
Mm. Then we go to Kairos Crossing.
Ulrich:
Absolutely not.
We finish this business here then we part ways.
Phineas:
Oh come on!
Why won’t you go on adventures with me?
Ulrich:
Truthfully?
I’m not interested in dropping what’s going on in my own life to help a brat like you.
You’re not the only one with an agenda, you know
Phineas:
No that’s cool though! Let’s do your stuff too!
I’m only on my own schedule.
Ulrich:
No. I said! Just drop it!
Phineas:
Uuuugh!
(Hmph!)
I don’t know why you gotta be so difficult.
Ulrich:
Wh-ME?!
I’m difficult?!
Oh! Right.
I eh…I have something for you.
Phineas:
Is it a pledge of undying friendship?
MHE – PAGE 125
Ulrich:
I thought maybe…
Phineas:
Oh my gosh did you make me socks
Ulrich:
Sort of.
Phineas:
You totally did!
Ulrich:
They work like those wraps you used before. These are just a lot less disgusting.
Phineas:
I can’t believe you did this! You’re brilliant!
Ulrich:
I’d be a pretty pisspoor performer if I couldn’t even make such a simple costume element, don’t you think?
How they fit?
Phineas:
Perfect, I love them!
Ulrich:
You have no excuse now. No more dirty bandages.
Phineas:
Nope! No more dirty bandages.
So
What’s our plan, smart guy?
Ulrich:
Well,
First we need to figure out how to get on Hazard’s ship.
(Sigh)
We’ll probably have to do some recon at the tower base. It could take a while though…
Phineas:
Why don’t we just ask somebody?
Ulrich:
Oh great idea. We’ll just ask.
They’ve got to have people out looking for you now, stupid.
Who are you just gonna ask?
MHE – PAGE 126
Ellie:
Right right…
Um yeah, I’ll take care of it. Don’t worry about a thing.
Are-are you-
Yes, He’s still…
No I’m fine, really. I won’t let things get out of hand.
…What?
Ehheheh, no don’t do that.
I um… I miss you.
Ha ha! Mm-hmm
I um- o-oh! They just walked in. I gotta go.
M-me too. Tell your brother I said hey.
Ulrich:
Well this is… quaint.
Suppose they charge extra for tables near the print of an old man spitting into a bucket?
Phineas:
Lighten up would you?
MHE – PAGE 127
Ulrich:
I just don’t like being out in the open like this.
Phineas:
You worry too much.
Want a peanut?
Ulrich:
… Yes I do.
Phineas:
It’ll be fine! You’re with me now.
If anyone tries anything…
I will grind them into a fine powder.
Ulrich:
I don’t need-!
Ellie:
Hi hi!
Welcome back, miss commander!
Wasn’t expecting to see you in here again so soon.
Phineas:
Can’t get rid of me that easy!
Ellie:
Eheheh, I can see that…
And is this a friend of yours?
Phineas:
YES IT IS.
Ulrich:
Phineas please.
I am Ulrich.
MHE – PAGE 128
Ulrich:
At your service.
Ellie:
Oh my!
For me?
Phineas:
(WHAT)
Ellie:
That’s so kind of you!
Ulrich:
I hope it makes your day a bit brighter.
Ellie:
Eheheh-let-let me go fetch my ticketbook.
Phineas:
WHAT NONSENSE DID I JUST WITNESS
Ulrich:
Stop shouting!
She’s the waitress you defended before.
Right?
Phineas:
How did you know?
(You really are a wizard)
Ulrich:
Phineas she just got done talking about meeting you yesterday.
But even ignoring that it’s obvious.
She fidgets, her speech is rushed and nervous.
Mostly her eyes give it away.
Phineas:
Oh so YOU can “just tell” ass this stuff from someone’s eyes but when I say
Ulrich:
No, listen.
MHE – PAGE 129
Ulrich:
It’s not some intuition thing, it’s just common sense.
Her eye makeup’s been redone. She’s been crying but she doesn’t want anyone to know about it.
Phineas:
Uh-huh.
You could tell all that from like five seconds?
You’re some kinda makeup expert too?
Ulrich:
I have
More than considerable experience reading faces that don’t want to be read.
It’s not an exaggeration to say it’s saved my life on more than one occasion.
Trickery is my craft, Kidd, and it’s not a practice that treats mediocrity kindly. I’m very good at what I do.
You’d best get used to it if we’re going to work together.
Phineas:
So You’re-
Ulrich:
JUST. For today.
And yes, I am also a cosmetic expert, smartass.
Phineas:
Hee hee!
Ellie:
Ok ok!
What’ll we be having?
Ulrich:
Pardon me for a moment, ladies.
Phineas:
Actually I was wanting to ask you something, Elle.
Ellie:
Oh?
…Oh!
Um, I think there’s a sort of…elevator?
MHE – PAGE 130
Ellie:
Hazard uses magic to get around but the workers have to use the lift to get onto the ship.
It’s the service elevator they built into the radio tower.
Phineas:
Oh easy, we’ll just hitch a ride up then.
Ellie:
Mm, not quite.
Hazard’s security is…relaxed, as far as the tower goes.
I…I guess he figures he’s strong enough to handle it if anyone tried to board his ship.
You can walk right up to the tower like you could before he moved in, but you still need something to make the elevator run.
Umm..A pass of some kind, a key or a card maybe?
I’m sorry, I’ve, er…
Ulrich:
. . .
Ellie:
I’ve never actually seen it up close before so I don’t know much more than tha.
Phineas:
It’s ok! More than we knew before.
Ulrich:
We need to leave.
Right now.
Phineas:
Huh?
MHE – PAGE 131
Ulrich:
A bunch of Hazard’s men are outside.
Ellie:
…?
Ulrich:
They’re heading this way.
Phineas:
Woah really?
Ulrich:
Don’t look, stupid!
Phineas:
What’s the big deal? I can beat ‘em up!
Ulrich:
Use your head!
Do you want to get Ellie in trouble for helping us?
Ellie:
A-are you sure-
Ulrich:
He he he, you wouldn’t happen to have another exit to this fine establishment would you?
Phineas:
Wow you’re super smart, Ulrich.
Good thing you’re here.
Ellie:
Oh-
O-of course. Right this way, please
There’s a little alley back here, if you follow it you’ll come out right near the square.
You can see the tower base from there.
Most of the buildings are empty, you shouldn’t have any trouble.
Ulrich:
Thanks very much, miss
Ellie:
Good luck you two!
Phineas:
Be safe ok? Don’t take anyone’s crap.
MHE – PAGE 132
Phineas:
Ha ha wow you’re good! I never even thought about just running away.
We could have really messed things up back there huh?
Ulrich:
Keep up.
We need to get some distance between us and them.
Phineas:
!
You got us breakfast too??
Ulrich:
Can’t fight on an empty stomach.
Phineas:
Hee hee! Man!
This is already way better than if I was-
Ulrich:
Phineas?
Oh what now?!
MHE – PAGE 133
Ulrich:
I can’t believe this.
Nobody-!
…uh.
Are you alright? What’s happened?
Phineas:
Aw, you do care.
Ulrich:
God damn it be serious! Where did they go?
Phineas:
He’s behind the door.
Ulrich:
…the do..?
Simon:
She’s…a lot lighter than she-
Ah!
It’s cool! I know this looks kinda bad, h-hah
Ulrich:
Correct!
You have five seconds to explain what the hell you think you’re doing.
Simon:
Sure sure! No problem I’d be happy to.
First could you maybe take your finger off0
Ulrich:
Three
Simon:
Ah! Yep okay!
MHE – PAGE 134
Simon:
I wanna help you guys!
I have something you’ll need to get up to where the wizard lives.
I uh, it’s in my pocket, if I could just…
Ulrich:
Slowly, please.
Simon:
There! There’s uh,
There’s like a service elevator built into the radio tower, that’s the thing his, his uh…
…island or whatever it is is sitting on.
Ulrich:
Sure it is.
Phineas:
Aw lay off Ulrich, he’s just a kid.
Hee hee!
Don’t worry! He does this a lot.
Simon:
Y-yeah?
Ulrich:
Quiet, Phineas.
How did you know we needed that?
Phineas:
(Ooh, good point)
Simon:
Look mister
I don’t know what your deal is, but I know she’s here to help us.
A lot of us know what you did last night, I mean…
You are gonna try and take out Hazard, right?
Phineas:
It’s on my list, yeah.
MHE – PAGE 135
Ulrich:
What do you mean ‘us?’ That’s one of Hazard’s scarves isn’t it?
Simon:
It’s my brother’s.
I..I took it from him last time I saw him.
None of them wanted to side with the wizard.
They had no choice, you know? Can you understand that?
Phineas:
I get it, but. . .
I wouldn’t have joined up.
Your brother picked the bad guys. Sorry.
Simon:
Then you don’t understand!
Ulrich:
Watch it boy.
Simon:
I should have known. You commanders DO throw away your humanity for your heathen powers.
How else could you possibly sit there and tell me-
Phineas:
I know what I am.
Are you going somewhere with this?
Simon:
You heretics have no value for human life! I’m afraid-
I’m asking that you spare my brother!
Phineas:
Well I don’t usually plan on killing anybody, so you can relax.
Ulrich:
I still don’t believe you. Any of this.
You drop out of the sky with the exact thing we need?
Right after we learn we need it?
And you’re just going to give it to us?
Simon:
…yes?
Ulrich:
BULLSHIT!
Phineas:
Ulrich knock it off!
Ulrich:
Oh you CANNOT be BUYING THIS.
I know it’s difficult for you but try to see reason.
Phineas:
Chill okay? We’re fine, it’s all fine.
MHE – PAGE 136
Ulrich:
No it is NOT FINE. He’s lying!
We could be surrounded by now!
Phineas:
He really wants to help us, though. I can tell.
Ulrich:
You CAN’T. TELL!
Phineas:
Yes I can!
How come YOU get to claim a skillset and I don’t?
Ulrich:
Delusional imbecile is NOT a skill!
[Phineas]
No it’s good!
Ulrich:
And I know…
I know for a fact that yours doesn’t work.
It can’t.
Phineas:
Ugh just!
Just trust me, ok? A little bit? We can’t function with you all tense like this.
Simon:
Sh…should I leave you two alone or…
Phineas:
Listen, let me. . .
It comes with the commander thing.
Commanders…fundamentally, pull up sun energy from the ground.
The energy is like a heartbeat. Sort of?
I’ve never been good at explaining this…
Simon:
Don’t look at her eyes, she might be trying to-
Ulrich:
You’re finished speaking.
Phineas:
If I can see the heartbeat, I should be able to see the heart, right?
Stuff that’s alive also gives off energy, just like the planet. Everything pulls from the same source.
So I can see your heart too.
Not like your real one, but…
It’s, ah. It’s blue, like I said. And it’s centered here at your throat.
MHE – PAGE 137
Ulrich:
I can’t read your mind or anything…
But that’s how I knew you were okay, even after we fought.
And it’s how I know you’re still not telling me everything.
But you feel like you’re doing the right thing by not telling.
That’s plenty enough for me.
I’m sorry, I know this is probably…uncomfortable. But we gotta get past this or we’re not gonna work.
For now, is that good enough for you to leave the dude’s head intact?
Ulrich & Simon:
……
Ulrich:
You’re saying he’s not lying?
Phineas:
I’m saying he means well
Ulrich:
That’s not what I asked…
…we should get going.
Phineas:
How bout this stuff?
Ulrich:
I’ll carry it.
Simon:
Just like that…?
. . . uh-
Phineas:
What’s your brother’s name?
Simon:
Oh it’s. . . It’s Constance. Could you-
Could you tell him I’m doing okay?
Simon’s doing okay?
MHE – PAGE 138
Phineas:
Sure thing. You want me to do that before or after I steal his soul?
Simon:
S…sorry.
But you’re one to talk about choices and consequences.
You can’t act like you didn’t expect this when you… I mean.
You turned yourself into a monster because of pride. That’s the worst sin there is.
Phineas:
Yeah that’s a weird thing huh?
Pride being the worst, I mean.
Why is that, do you think?
Simon:
…I don’t think it’s our place to decide that.
God makes the rules, not me. Not you, either.
Phineas:
(Hee! Hee!)
Yeah?
Simon:
I’ll pray for your soul. And your…safety.
Phineas:
That’s very kind, thank you.
Please don’t concern yourself too much, though.
My soul’s in very capable hands.
Pff. You ‘bout ready?
…
Ulrich:
Ahem
You shouldn’t-that guy doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
Phineas:
Hmm?
MHE – PAGE 139
Ulrich:
People like that. . . People are always angry when they see others who are actively trying to change their circumstances.
I don’t know anything about commanding so maybe I’m just ignorant. For all I know you ARE some kind of monster.
But if you made some choice with the intention of changing your own life for the better then you’re the stronger person.
People who try to punish others for controlling their own destiny are scum.
Phineas:
…
Ulrich:
Sorry, that may have come from nowhere but I’ve. . . dealt with a lot of characters like that.
Don’t let them get to you. They’re not worth it.
Phineas:
Wow um, thanks!
Don’t worry about me though, that stuff stopped bothering me years ago.
Ulrich:
Well not me.
People like him have no business criticising people like us. It’s a good way to get killed
Phineas:
Aw I dunno. I think having the advantage means you should be gentle, when you can be.
Most of them are probably just scared. If it makes people feel more comfortable to think I’m a monster that’s fine with me.
Like you said, they’re not worth worrying about, right?
Ulrich:
…
Comfort.
Phineas:
Yep yep!
MHE – PAGE 140
Phineas:
Can’t blame them too much though! I am stronger than pretty much everybody.
I can see why people might find me frightening.
Ulrich:
Right. As if a simpleton like you could ever frighten anybody.
Phineas:
Hee hee!
. . .
Last chance to bail.
Ulrich:
Try not to say stupid things.
I am slightly concerned by the lack of cover out here.
Let’s be quick.
This is still too strange. No Guards? None? Where is everyone?
Phineas:
Weren’t there some dudes back at the bar?
Ulrich:
. . . I saw a few. Hazard only sent one group?
Phineas:
Maybe Ellie threw them off our trail.
Ulrich:
Mmm, a query, if you’ll indulge me.
What does your little skill tell you about Ellie?
MHE – PAGE 141
Phineas:
You know!
!
It’s really weird!
She acts all nervous and stuff, but I get the feeling she’s really strong.
Like, physically strong. Maybe stronger than I am.
. . . Well, as strong.
Ulrich:
Why aren’t we moving?
Phineas:
Like half as strong probably.
Ulrich:
. . . What’s that noise?
Phineas:
It’s an elevator silly! Elevators make noises.
You’ve gotta relax, friend.
Ulrich:
Please remove your hand.
Phineas:
We’re gonna get to Hazard, one way or. . .
MHE – PAGE 142
Phineas:
Uh
Ulrich:
Son of a BITCH.