GTS – Page 156 – Kidd Commander!

GTS – Page 156

by Aria on September 18, 2022 at 5:22 PM

Chapter: Green Thousand Sing

+19

well here we are

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EDIT 9/23:

Hi, some news, my dad died at home sometime last week. He was an abusive, violent man and my sister and I have been estranged for several years now, but the estate needs to be dealt with. It’s a shambles so it’s going to be a little bit of an ongoing project, I’m definitely not going to be putting my comic on the backburner because of this BUT if things do get slow that’s why. It’s certainly thrown off my schedule this week at least, I’d planned to get one more page done before the convention this weekend. Oh well.

I appreciate the sentiment but please don’t tell me you’re sorry, I just wanted to mention it in case things stay busy here at the start of this whole process. Anyway, in lieu of new content please enjoy this tape from a large collection of homemade recordings of sermons from the church I grew up in. It’s part of a series about the end times, and somehow a moth wing got tangled in the ribbon.

Thanks, see y’all soon.

Transcript:

Ulrich:
(did he hear that just now?)

Toulouse:
Maybe not that weird.
I used to think they were watching me.

Ulrich:
(INSEKT! INSEKTEN!!)
Hm?
(back through the door down the stairs out into the rain)
(oh, the rain – on the glass, is louder in here)

Toulouse:
The moths. I always felt like they were watching, with the eyes on their wings.

Ulrich:
(unacceptable screed)

Toulouse:
We even call our church “The Watching Wing,” I can’t remember if anyone said it today.
But I don’t think they’re judging us, they’re scared.
They’re always looking for threats, you know?

Ulrich:
(DURCHBRENNEN MIT MIR)
(where is this COMING from??)

Toulouse:
A whole identity made of paranoia, built right into the body.

Ulrich:
(GET HOLD OF YOURSELF.)
That sounds exhausting.

Toulouse:
You would know, huh?

Ulrich:
What do you mean?

Toulouse:
You know what I mean.

Ulrich:
(he’s. said this before.)
(he is repeating himself.)
(what is HAPPENING)
(meine schulter schmerzt)
(hey also what if something bad happens to agatha i just think we shouldn’t have left her alone)
(I bet his hair is VERY soft 🙂 )

Toulouse:
There’s room, here.

Ulrich:
(don’t you dare)
Ach, I think I’ll stand, if it’s all the same.

Toulouse:
It isn’t.

Nutmeg

Me, google translating: O.O … >:3

Also YES GO BACK FOR AGATHA PLS NOTICE

(also also, he compared Ulrich to a moth!!)
- marithness
  
  I hadn’t thought to translate “durchbrennen mit mir” until I read your comment and o.O
  
  So…
  
  Toulouse: So yeah I channel these constantly terrified paranoid moth gods.
  
  Ulrich: I hate your religion but nonetheless I would like to subscribe to your newsletter.
Firebee

The random little ‘I bet his hair is really soft’ with a fricken smiley face is amazing XD I love the contrast of humor and unease/fear in this scene! Im so genuinely worried about Ulrich and kind of scared of Toulouse, but at the same time I cant help but laugh at the little voices 10/10
Evan Cross

I still dont know if i love or hate Toulouse
Gay Kitty

As always, I’m love the boys. And I am feeling fear. I do not have a brain so I can’t guess what is going on here but I am getting yelled at by myself that SOMETHING IS HAPPENING PAY ATTENTION AND WORRY so I am Paying Attention. And I am Worried
caribouchat

it isn’t
pseudorandom

Ulrich having a crush is very cute, even if (especially if?) it’s making him lose his mind even more than usual because his usual hypervigilant anxiety is kicking into high gear due to everything else going on. And, yeah, I don’t have it near as extreme as Ulrich, but having part of you be swept up in one part of an experience while another’s sitting back and analyzing at the same time is a bit of a mood.
Halogen360

I’m genuinely worried for everyone but Ulrich especially. His chapters are always a little mind fucky, but I feel like we’ve reached a whole new level these last few pages and I am honestly here for it. I have a feeling once this whole section is out I am really gonna enjoy the reread and trying to piece together everything that’s happened with hindsight in place!!
Chromoid

I’ve counted seven different internal “voices” for Ulrich so far. Based on the script in the descriptions, they’re all supposed to be “him,” so I’m going to assume it’s either some trauma-induced compartmentalization of his psyche, or- more likely -it’s supposed to represents different “aspects” of his mind.

The following is all my own assessment of the situation so far and should not be taken seriously as any sort of authoritative statement on what’s going on here. I’m just spitballin’. Input is very welcome. 🙂

-Bold, simple, blue text: This seems to be Ulrich’s rational thought. Logic, if you will. It seems to be what holds everything else in check and does the brunt of his analysis. If I had to guess, this is as close to his “normal” as you’re likely to get. Interestingly enough, this internal voice seems to be pretty disconnected/detached from the affairs and concerns of the others.

-Black, spindly text: Best I can guess, this is his self-critical aspect. Some would call it “conscience,” but it feels more artificial than that. Quite possibly a coping mechanism put in place to handle his more rowdy mental aspects, which we’ll get to in a moment. Definitely a brute-force measure if this last supposition is true.

-Gray, italic text (sometimes with pale blue background): This is his pain. Everything that’s getting him down, anything that’s weighing on his mind, whatever’s making him weary and hurt. Pretty simple and, by the looks of things, pretty volatile/loud. The previous voice seems to deal primarily with this one and keep it quiet so everything else can have a turn, otherwise it’d never shut up.

-Soft, pale-yellow text: This seems to be some combination of his hope and happiness. Might be whatever love he has left mixed in there as well. Prone to being both soft and cheerful, as well as containing his innate distaste for bugs. Something makes me think this is what’s left of his “inner child.”

-Blue, italic text: Worry. That’s all this one does. Oddly enough, it seems to only worry about others. Agatha, in this case. Possibly a form of parental/guardian mentality that continuously keeps track of those he’s trying to protect. Obviously he’s not so concerned about Phin because she’s a very self-confident stick of blasphemous, star-fueled dynamite, but Agatha is vulnerable in society and still very fragile as a person. Did he have a child at one time…?

-Bold, yellow, staticky text: I’d guess this is both passion and impulse. It is one of the most spontaneous voices and only second to his pain in terms of volume. So much so that it seems to surprise even his logical voice. It’s very feral and untamed, which makes it probably more dangerous than the others in terms of power in his head.

-Bold, blue, staticky text: This one is the weird one for me. It seems to be some form of “awareness” that can sense things a normal human shouldn’t be able to sense. For that reason, I’m going to assume it’s some kind of sixth/danger sense, possibly tied to whatever special “gifts” he may possess.

Interesting to note that ALL of these voices, save for Logic, have some element of FEAR in them. This, to me, represents his paranoia and how deeply it saturates every aspect of his life. Also interesting to note that when any of his voices hit a certain threshold of passion/concern/stress, they revert to his native language.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
- Mike South
  
  <3
Mike South

I’m glad for whatever closure you get from an abuser’s passing. I’m glad that you had already taken steps to distance yourself when it was still your decision. That can be really hard to do, even when a parent is violent and abusive, and it appears that you figured it out before it was “decided for you” by this event. I hope that the process of cleaning up after doesn’t bring back too much trauma, but if it does, it’s not your fault, and there’s no reason to feel shame about that if it does. You’re not the one to blame for the situation. I wish you the very best as you process this transition. I believe in you, and I’ll bet a bunch of the rest of us here do, too.
Apple

It was so lovely meeting you and your partner today Aria!!
- Aria
  
  Yeah dude I’m still super psyched you came out to see the booth, it’s so cool getting to chat with a longtime reader in person!! I hope you like your posters and such and the rest of your day was fun :3 (This Reply Officially Co-signed By Lee~)
  - Apple
    
    I love the merch so much!! Hi again Lee! 😄
Elkian

Your finger looks a lil scarred there, Toulouse.
- Aria
  
  He picks at the skin on his fingers quite a bit, which isn’t like EXCLUSIVELY an ocd thing by any measure but definitely comes with the territory weh